Last Updated
2 days ago (01/30/2015)

Good Comebacks

2 days ago
If I wanted shit from you, I'd squeeze your head.
6 days ago
I don't see any penises in the general vicinity... So I'm wondering why you keep opening your fucking mouth.
6 days ago
I'm sorry dear, but in order for you to insult me, I must first value your opinion. Nice try though.
8 days ago
I don't remember asking you for your opinion, but since we're sharing how we feel... I think you should go fuck yourself.
10 days ago
Oh, interesting. Let me just write that on my list of things that I don't give a shit about.
11 days ago
I poured my heart to you and you reply "oh lol." Bitch, I hope you get hit by a bus so I can be like... "oh lol."
11 days ago
Your doctor called with your colonoscopy results. Good news, they found your head!
12 days ago
No, no, sweetie. You're not 'THE shit'. You're a PIECE of shit. There's a world of difference.
20 days ago
I knew pussies had lips, but I didn't know they could talk.
21 days ago
Life's a bitch. Oh no, wait. That's you.
23 days ago
The problem with you is that you lack the power of conversation but not the power of speech.
24 days ago
I'm not an astronomer, but I'm pretty sure that the Earth revolves around the Sun and not you.
26 days ago
I guess those penis enlargement pills are working - you're twice the dick you were yesterday!
1 month ago
Oh, what was that? I couldn't hear you with all your shit clogging up my ear!
1 month ago
Quick, check your face! I just found your nose in my business.
1 month ago
My intense desire to unfriend you is outweighed by the enjoyment I feel gawking at the huge trainwreck that is your life.
1 month ago
You know what's funny? Not you, so shut up.
1 month ago
There may be two sides to every story, but you're still a douche in both of them.
2 months ago
Insult: Why do you even wear a bra? You don't have anything to put in it.
Comeback: You wear pants, don't you?
2 months ago
If you didn't see it with your own eyes or hear it with your own ears, don't invent it with your small mind and share it with your big mouth!