Last Updated
1 day ago (12/19/2014)

Good Comebacks

1 day ago
Quick, check your face! I just found your nose in my business.
6
2 days ago
My intense desire to unfriend you is outweighed by the enjoyment I feel gawking at the huge trainwreck that is your life.
-1
4 days ago
You know what's funny? Not you, so shut up.
27
4 days ago
There may be two sides to every story, but you're still a douche in both of them.
14
18 days ago
Insult: Why do you even wear a bra? You don't have anything to put in it.
Comeback: You wear pants, don't you?
44
26 days ago
If you didn't see it with your own eyes or hear it with your own ears, don't invent it with your small mind and share it with your big mouth!
34
29 days ago
Do you mean to mumble or is your mouth just naturally full of shit?
71
1 month ago
By the power vested in me, I now pronounce you blocked and deleted. You may now kiss my ass.
143
2 months ago
Insult: Suck my dick!
Comeback: Why take the job away from your mother?
126
2 months ago
Person: You are what you eat.
Comeback: Perhaps that's why you're such a dick.
91
2 months ago
Person: What are you looking at?
Comeback: Your dad's incorrect use of a condom.
97
2 months ago
Listen, moron. If you're going to try and insult me, at least be grammatically correct. I'm too busy mentally correcting your errors to be offended.
51
2 months ago
The difference between pizza and your opinion is that I asked for pizza.
71
2 months ago
I can't understand you with all the shit coming out of your mouth.
79
2 months ago
If you have a problem with me, please kindly write it on a piece of paper, put it in an envelope, fold it up, and put it in your ass.
100
2 months ago
Hey, unless your name is Google, stop acting like you f*cking know everything.
175
3 months ago
I hope one day, you choke on the shit you talk.
133
3 months ago
Bully: You're stupid!
Comeback: So was you Dad when he thought he didn't need a condom.
150
4 months ago
If I toss a stick, will you go away?
72
4 months ago
Bully: Give me your money!
Victim: I would, but I gotta pay your mom for last night.
175