Last Updated 12/10/2011
Relationship Insults
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1.
489
53I called your boyfriend gay and he hit me with his purse! -
2.
322
45Bacon is bacon, eggs are eggs, don't let guys between your legs, they say you're cute, they say you're fine, nine months later they say not mine.
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3.
245
60Wanna get laid? Just crawl up a chicken's ass and wait!
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4.
191
42It's men like you that make women gay.
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5.
188
51Your wife said she liked seafood. So I gave her crabs.
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6.
175
43If you ever become a mother, can I have one of the puppies?
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7.
152
25Whats the difference between your girlfriend and a walrus?
One has a moustache and smells of fish and the other is a walrus. -
8.
171
47I'll never forget the first time we met -- although, I'll keep trying.
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9.
140
28You're just mad because your hair is straighter than you are.
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10.
148
41They say opposites attract. I hope you meet someone who is good-looking, intelligent, and cultured.
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11.
103
22Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
Garbage is dumped,
And so are you. -
12.
129
48Your girlfriend is so ugly she went to a dog show. And won.
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13.
73
35They call it 'PMS' because 'Mad Cow Disease' was already taken.
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14.
76
40You are the kind of person who, when one first meets you, one doesn't like you. But when one gets to know you better, one hates you.We know that romance brings out the beast in you -- the jackass.
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15.
66
32I've had many cases of love that were just infatuation, but this hate I feel for you is the real thing.
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16.
52
20Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship.
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17.
59
32I'd love to go out with you, but my favorite commercial is on TV.
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18.
33
8Marriage is like a hot bath. Once you get used to it, it's not so hot.
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19.
48
29He was happily married - but his wife wasn't.
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20.
37
22I've had many cases of love that were just infatuation, but this hate I feel for you is the real thing.
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21.
20
18I wish our marriage certificate came with an expiry date.
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22.
27
37You are so two-faced that any woman who married you would be married to a bigamist.
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23.
32
49I'll hit you so hard your wife will fall!
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24.
35
56You loud Dick-Lips.
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25.
18
74Here lies my wife: here let her lie !
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